Why “mean mommy”?
Mar 16th, 2009 by Denise
I’m a professional freelance writer — visit me at www.deniseschipani.com – and mother of two. I didn’t set out to be “mean,” but as the years have passed in this adventure we call motherhood, I realized that my relentlessly practical nature, combined with my inborn stubborn streak, make me ill-suited to the loosey-goosey parenting style currently in vogue. I’m just doing my bit to nudge the pendulum back to somewhere between 60s commune (too far in one direction!) and kids should be seen and not heard (too far in the other!).
Sometimes I feel like “mean mommy” too. I’m hoping the kid’ll thank me when he grows up with good manners … but probably not. I’m enjoying your blog — I remember the marshmallow experiment!
BTW, I added your blog to my blog roll. Would you consider adding Don’t Put Lizards In Your Ears to yours? I’m at http://www.norinedworkin.com/blog.
Norine
That’s the hope, right, Norine? That they’ll thank us — hopefully while we’re still able to understand what they’re saying! I’ll absolutely add your blog to my roll!
Amen! Just found your blog and enjoy your style. I have three boys and it gets a little loud around here–not them but me!
I can’t wait to read more of your blog! I recently read an article you wrote for American Baby and had to check this out when I saw the name of your website. I am called “mean mommy” or “meanie” almost daily! I remember thinking the same of my mom, so I do think they’ll appreciate our “mean-ness” when they have kids of their own one day. I have too many friends who want to be friends with their children rather than parents. And those are the kids that I dread coming to my house to visit! But I hear so often how my kids are so well behaved when I’m present and when I’m not. It feels good to know that they are learning what is appropriate behavior and what isn’t, even if it means that they think I’m a meanie!
Rachell
Thanks for your comment, Rachell! I hope you keep reading — and if you have comments, ideas, suggestions, whatever, feel free to let me know. Mean moms unite — after all, it’s about turning out great kids and adults, right?!
Denise
Your boys are gorgeous!
My twins are only 10 weeks old but I am definitely already a mean mommy
Have enjoyed reading your archives and now subscribed to keep following along!
I got married last month and while we don’t have kids yet, my husband and I are “working on it”. I have to admit that when we talk about having kids, I often find myself saying, “I’m going to be such a mean mommy!”. We are in our mid-thirties and are the last in our circle of friends to get married. All of our friends have kids – we had 30 guests under the age of 10 at our wedding – and they can’t wait for us to add to the collective brood of youngsters. While we are excited about the prospect, I don’t want to follow in my friends’ footsteps and become one of the obsessive, permissive mommies that seem to predominate these days. Who knows how things will work out for us, but its a relief to read your blog and discover that there are sane role models for motherhood out there. Thank you!
It’s my favorite compliment to pay in the office–”so-and-so, you are great–I don’t care WHAT your kids say about you!” Always makes a parent smile, no matter how old their children are…
Hi Denise,
Just happened to stumble across your blog while searching for some sweepstakes to enter, I noticed that you blogged about toothpaste not being in suitable flavors for your boys and was wondering: What advice do you have for a me, a young mother who is trying to get her two year old(She will be three in like 3 weeks) to brush her teeth and which toothpaste would you recommend for me to buy for her, because all that my local Walgreen’s has is Training toothpaste, which to me will do nothing for her teeth in the long run?
Thanks, and once again, good blog!!!
Hi. Just found you. I would definitely qualify as a “mean mommy” too, and yet, amazingly enough, I get TONS of compliments on how great/funny/nice/thoughtful/etc my kids are. Hmmm…. could the “experts” be wrong? Surely not!
I’m off to subscribe. I suspect our kids would get on famously! (Except mine are older than yours)